Coconut Cîroc. Forgive & forget? Nigga I already forgot.
I’m over the nigga & he over the top, they say love is the key?
well somebody change the lock, dannggg
& I wish I never met ya, & I heard you doin’ good & you heard I’m doin’ better..
& all ya gotta do is put 2 & 2 together, but that just makes 4.. not forever, mannnn
So I guess I’m single for the night & you can sit right on my middle finger for the night..
& if I sound mad then ya caught me, but this should explain alllll the ways that YOU TAUGHT ME-
How to hate a b*^%$#, that owe ya everything, at least a wedding ring.. moving onto better things <3
My daddy.
Words can’t being to explain how I feel, or the gaping hole in my heart that nearly two months later still hasn’t begun to heal.
Up until now I haven’t been able to write about it, but it can’t make me feel any worse than I do right now.
I miss my Dad, my backbone, my better half, the angel on my shoulder, my sunshine & my very best friend.
I miss my secret keeper, my pizza maker, my car starter, 11:11 wish & my goodmorning/goodnight text.
I miss his hugs, I miss his laugh. I miss him fussing at me, I miss him telling me what to do. I don’t know how in the world I’m supposed to go forever living without the only person I really need.
Losing him makes everything look unimportant. People are being people, & I’m struggling to do the right thing & be the bigger person.
I need him to tell me what to do.
I say that, but when I think hard- in almost every situation I know exactly what he’d say. He spent every day doing the right thing, I know all the answers.. he taught me enough. But I need his push. I need him to tell me he’s proud of me.
I need him to tuck me in at night. I need to be 13 again. I need to tell him about making mistakes, so he can assure me it’ll all work out. I need to hear his voice & talk to him on the phone way too much. I need to come home to late but still go in & kiss him on the cheek before I go to bed.
I need to tell him I love him again. I need to hear him laugh again, see him smile, see him cry. I need to ride around in the truck with him one more time, I need him to tell me that smoking is bad for me.
I need him to say nothing I do could make him love me less.
I just, NEED HIM :(
I don’t understand how I can feel this way forever,
I swear most of me died when he did. & although I know he wouldn’t want me feeling this way I can’t help it. He knew how much I loved him, everyone does.
I will never be the same..
It’s a constant spiral downwards since the day you left me. Everyone keeps telling me that it will get better.. I wish they would stop. Because they don’t understand, it’s never going to be “better”. Cause you’ll never be back. There will always be a huge void that you left when you went. How am I supposed to live without my heart? This is killing me. I just want one more day with you, one more minute.. anything.
You were my everything, my support, my backbone, my bestfriend.
Now it’s all gone & I’m left here trying to make sense of things, trying to figure out how I can go on the rest of my life without you.. I don’t think I can.
I don’t want to. I’m miserable. I miss you, Daddy.
